Are you ”painfully” shy?
Would you rather shoot yourself in the foot than return the gaze of a guy you fancy?
If your answer is yes to the above questions, this article is for you.
Shyness is a very common phenomenon. It can however get in the way of your dating life especially when it is extreme. You shouldn’t however despair because there are many ways to get the attention of any man even when you are completely introverted.
No man including your Ex is beyond reach when you consider using the tips discussed below. One of the most important things to consider involves learning how to deal with your fears, anxiety and insecurities quietly without killing attraction by appearing desperate, lost, antisocial etc.
In our modern culture, everyone is focused on becoming more social, popular, and liked–since all of these personality traits come with many benefits.
Extroverted people generally have more friends, fun and success than introverts. They also tend to suffer from loneliness and depression less. Becoming more outgoing and social is about living life to the fullest, unafraid to express yourself or go after what you want in life. Since being extroverted has so many benefits to it, it makes sense to want to get rid of your shyness.
Read along to get the 5 tips to getting his attention..
1) Getting your conversation skills up to speed
In particular, you want to start becoming more impulsive in what you say. While there are some situations, like job interviews, where you want to be very careful about what you say, in most you should focus on talking more often and more spontaneously.
This is going to sound bad, but try not to think too much before you speak in informal social situations. If you put too much effort into everything you say, you’ll come across as a try-hard. By being spontaneous and just letting the words flow, you become easy-going, which is what people like.
In some situations you can probably already talk to people easily and spontaneously. It could be around your family, your niece or nephew, or talking to a close friend. However, when around people you don’t know well or are intimidated of, you aren’t able to act the same way.
Your shyness gets in the way.
A lot of the time, this issue can fix itself through gradual exposure. An intimidating stranger soon become a close friend if you hang around him several times. By spending more time with people you’ll start to get the hang of talking to strangers.
Believe it or not, how well you make conversation is not a talent you were born with, but a skill set. Just like riding a bicycle, the more you practice this skill set the better you will become and the easier you’ll find it to be relaxed around new people
In lowering your levels of nervousness when talking to people, there are many useful techniques to help you relax. Relaxation has the effect of demonstrating to your brain that there is nothing to be afraid of in this situations, which makes your brain’s anxiety lessen.
You want that: nothing kills feelings of nervousness and anxiety faster than physical relaxation.
Your relaxation routine should be structured in a way that gets you the maximum results in overcoming shyness. It is not an event, it is a process. It is more effective to implement relaxation as a new routine rather than try it out one time incorrectly when you are in the middle of a full-blown anxiety attack.
It will be the compounding of accumulated change that yields the most substantial results. Set aside some time every day to practice relaxation. This will let you become relaxed when you are feeling at your most tense and nervous around people.
3) Want him but don’t need him
There is a very big difference between wanting and needing.
Women who want men are in more control than those who need them since they can do well for themselves. If you are a desperately shy woman, you need to drill this fact deeper into your head.
Forget about the notion that women need men for them to be complete since such notions are false in today’s world. You should be alive to the fact that there is nothing wrong with being alone. Many women have stayed single and have done perfectly well for themselves. Therefore, there is no reason to need a man desperately.
When you understand this fact, you will have more control over your life which is very attractive in the eyes of most men. You shouldn’t worry too much about your shyness because it can easily be overshadowed by your independence.
4) Go where the men are
This is another important tip to consider if you are desperately shy and you still want to get a man’s attention.
One of the best ways of overcoming your fears is to face them. It is therefore better for you to deal with your shyness by confronting it as opposed to confining yourself.
If he broke your heart, it’s time to get out there again. Don’t let your shyness get into your way. In fact, he is more likely to have renewed interest in you when he sees you enjoying yourself.
Social places/events i.e. music festivals, boat shows, outdoor movie screenings, plays, comedy clubs etc. are great places for meeting men. Such places are perfect for shy women since they take most of the focus away from them.
5) Ask for help
It is also important to note that men can’t say no to women when it comes to lending a helping hand. It doesn’t matter how old or young you are or even if you are married or single.
Guys are programmed to help women in need of some assistance especially when it involves a manly task i.e. opening a tight jar, lifting heavy objects, changing a flat tire etc. This tip is very easy to use even if you are desperately shy because you don’t need pick up lines, ice breakers, or creative conversation starters. You simply ask for help.
Your Ex will find it hard to say no when you ask for help. A stranger you fancy will also fall for the trick. You can then initiate additional conversation and keep things rolling.
The above tips will definitely do wonders in your life especially if you are desperately shy and you want to get his attention. You don’t have to sit back and feel sorry for yourself anymore.
It is possible to use the above information and change things for the better. Whether it’s rekindling a broken relationship or starting fresh, the above tips have been tested and proven to work perfectly, even for painfully shy women.